Where did you get the idea for the website?

The idea for Grated Guys was born in the mind of a then 53 year old guy, (ME) in 1997. I came up with it after wading through all the pornography and sexually oriented chat rooms on the internet over the years. I pretty much became tired of the scene as it stood then and thought there needed to be a website that focused on the G-rated side of the gay Internet.

It then went through many incarnations before it finally culminated in the website as it stands. The concept has always been to show that gays were more than mere sexual animals...as our website states... we can be loving, monogamous, gentlemen, responsible and committed. Originally the website and the concept was the basis for my first website JTMWorld.com which is no longer around. Within this website I had a group of galleries of grated photos and I named it G-RatedGuys. Before long I noticed that I had more people arriving at the website through the name Grated guys than I did as JTMWorld so I dropped JTMWorld and switched to Grated Guys.

Over the years I have had many revisions of my thoughts on "g-ratedness" , and what it really means...... at first I thought it had to mean only ' nototalnudity' , but then finally I decided that it means far more than that.... it means people who care about their lives and their contributions to humanity and the future of their families within a gay lifestyle. People who have no issue against nudity but want it treated like a normal respectable adult would treat it.. with dignity, and the occasional interest in something a little less pure, but certainly not to wallow in pornography.I also thought that it means that we live our lives with integrity and with a positive outlook and with the desire for happiness.

There are other aspects as well. I became disillusioned with the "coming out"philosophy that says that you must " try everything" including unthinking promiscuity et al, before you will know who you are as a homosexual; that there are no morals and no values you need to ascribe to in life; that your lifestyle as a gay male is inherently different than as a straight male; that men by their very nature can't be monogamous, blah blah blah....

And last but not least I started to firmly believe that there is a place for gays in religion as well, where we can lift our hearts, our minds, and our hands with love and praise of our Lord, in whatever religion we choose and not have to hide our heads in shame because we are gay. That is our positive message when it comes to religion and that is why we choose not to entertain any messages on this community that proselytize that being gay is a sin and we must forsake our gay lifestyle in order to live at one with our God. So, that is where the idea all came from. However right, or however wrong, it is what I believe in. Providing this community and the website is something I believe God wants me to do with my life... so in spite of the obstacles I carry on.


WHAT WE STAND FOR

Intergenerational Relationships
We believe that age has no bearing on relationships. As long as an individual has reached the age of majority he has the right to choose whatever adult he wishes as his partner. We do not believe that a gay male's preference for an older or younger adult, legally consenting partner is any different or any less real or any less acceptable than a gay male's preference for a partner his own age. And we do not believe that it indicates any kind of character flaw or psychological disorder.

Gay Pride and Shouting it from the rooftops
On being proud of who we are, we believe that we should be. But we don't believe that we should throw who we are in everyone's face... the responsible gay life is not about shock value or rebellion. It is about living a daily life just as everyone else does, but knowing in our hearts that we are good and valuable people regardless or maybe even because of our sexual orientation, and not flaunting it in everyone's face. No one likes it when heterosexuals flaunt their lifestyle in everyone's face... to think that they do is a pure falacy.... the same holds true for homosexuals.

On being a polite society
With all the aforesaid, we believe that this is to be a small spot on the internet where we can all come together in a social environment that respects the common and decent rules of everyday society. We are not prudes, nor are we perfect, or naive... but we put aside some of our personalities in order to congregate in an orderly and respectful fashion...

Young People Coming to terms with their sexuality
First of all we want you all to know you are special people... not "special" people, but special people, just as are all people in God's world.

No..this isn't a bible-thumping message... just that whether you believe in a God or you don't, you are all placed on this earth for a special purpose of goodness that is unique to you and part of your journey through your younger years is to learn what that purpose is.
For the most part it isn't a difficult search.. it is just a matter of looking into your heart and your senses and seeing what it is that you really want to do with your life. Without alcohol, tobacco or other drugs, this search becomes so much easier... because these stimulants actually tend to cut us off from who we are as real people. Once you have found that passion then know that you have the strength to act upon it.

If you are a young gay male who is just coming to terms with life.... you have a purpose in life... and you have not only the right but the support of all caring and compassionate people to fulfill your purpose.
It is our belief here at G-RatedGuys, whether agreed to by the majority of the clergy or not, that a gay life lived with commitment, monogamy, fidelity and trust to one other person is not a sin. It is also our belief that we do not need to lead a life apart from the rest of society; to experience all that is bad in sexuality; to be promiscuous and free-wheeling. We believe that we can hold true to the same respectful values taught to us as youngsters in a heterosexual society and live them throughout our gay life. The values are sound values...they hold true whether you are a gay or heterosexual ....

On Exceptions to the Rule
Regardless of who you are or what you believe in there will always be exceptions to the rule. There will always be individuals who want to abuse others, take from others, and give nothing in return. There will always be individuals who want to defame others and denigrate all that is good about humanity.

But here, at G-RatedGuys, our purpose is to look forward with hope and faith and a sound, positive outlook on our future and on the futures of those around us.
Some of us hold profound beliefs in a God, whether a Christian God, a Jewish or an Islamic God or any other subset or unique religious sect... and some of us don't. But we are all members of the human race and we respect that as such we all have the right to have differences and to have our own beliefs and to support those rights for others.